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Lightning Fill In The Blank

Sep 7, 2019
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TOM PAPA, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as she can. Each correct answer is worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Bim and Paula each have one. Amy has three.

AMY DICKINSON: What?

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Honestly.

KURTIS: Big lead.

DICKINSON: What?

POUNDSTONE: How does a thing like that happen?

PAPA: All right. We flipped a coin, and Bim has elected to go first. Bim, fill in the blank. Rescue workers are still dealing with extreme flooding after Hurricane Dorian tore through the blanks early this week.

BIM ADEWUNMI: Bahamas.

PAPA: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: On Thursday, former White House press secretary blank announced she was writing a memoir.

ADEWUNMI: Sarah Sanders-Huckabee (ph), that person.

PAPA: Right enough.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: An hourslong standoff outside of the home of a wanted felon in Utah ended peacefully after the SWAT team blanked.

ADEWUNMI: Vaped.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: Realized that the felon wasn't home.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: On Thursday, social media site blank launched their own in-app dating service.

ADEWUNMI: Facebook.

PAPA: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: On Wednesday, Johns Hopkins announced a new research center for the study of medicine made from blank.

ADEWUNMI: Iridescent goop.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: Psychedelics. An animal shelter in Australia says...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

PAPA: ...They're having trouble finding a home for one of their cats because her face has markings that look like blank.

ADEWUNMI: Hitler's mustache.

PAPA: A wiener.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: The animal rescue in Sydney says that Daisy is an adorable ragdoll cat who's great with kids and loves to cuddle. But they're still having trouble getting her adopted because in addition to all of her wonderful traits, she also has a patch of brown fur that runs from her eyes straight down her nose that looks exactly like a man's eggplant. And if you think that's tough for Daisy, imagine how confusing it was for the vet who had to neuter her face.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: Bill, how did Bim do?

KURTIS: Bim got three right for six more points. She has a total of seven and the lead right now.

(APPLAUSE)

PAPA: OK. Paula, you're up next. Fill in the blank - on Tuesday, a court in blank declared the state's legislative map unconstitutional.

POUNDSTONE: Maybe North Carolina.

PAPA: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: Evacuations were ordered on Thursday as another blank continued to rage in Southern California.

POUNDSTONE: A fire.

PAPA: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: This week, the Trump Administration announced $15 million reward for anyone able to help disrupt the finances of blank's Revolutionary Guard.

POUNDSTONE: Iran's.

PAPA: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: On Sunday, the pope had to be rescued by firefighters after getting stuck in blank at the Vatican.

POUNDSTONE: In an elevator.

PAPA: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: Police in Wales pulled over a motorist after officers spotted him driving with blank strapped to the top of his car.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, a horse?

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: They pulled him over when they saw him driving with another car strapped to the top of his car.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, I did know that.

PAPA: On Thursday, Ireland announced that they'd plant 440 million trees by 2040 to help combat blank.

POUNDSTONE: Climate change?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: That's right. This week, a vegan in Australia sued her next-door neighbors...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

PAPA: ...Saying they're deliberately trying to provoke her by blanking.

POUNDSTONE: Barbecuing.

PAPA: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: Grilling meat in their backyard. The woman says that her neighbor's constant barbecues means she can no longer enjoy her own backyard because, quote, "all I can smell is fish." A lower court has already thrown out the lawsuit, so she's now trying to take it all the way to Australia's Supreme Court. If she gets her way, the woman says she's excited to once again fill her house with the wonderful vegan scents, like sprouted mung beans and tofu farts.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: Bill, how did Paula do?

KURTIS: She got six right for 12 more points. She has a total of 13 and a healthy lead.

(APPLAUSE)

DICKINSON: Tough to beat.

PAPA: And how many does Amy need to win?

KURTIS: Five to tie, six to win.

PAPA: OK. All right, Amy. This is for the game. Fill in the blank - on monday, the Pentagon confirmed millions of dollars were being diverted to pay for the blank.

DICKINSON: The wall.

PAPA: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: On Tuesday, Walmart announced that it was cutting back on its sale of blank.

DICKINSON: Ammunition.

PAPA: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: This week, Hong Kong's chief executive withdrew the blank bill that sparked weeks of anti-government protests.

DICKINSON: The export bill?

PAPA: Extradition. It's a hard word. Yeah, you got it right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: On Wednesday, a jury cleared lawyer Gregory Craig of lying to special counsel blank.

DICKINSON: Robert Mueller?

PAPA: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: A man in England was shocked when he opened a can of baked beans and discovered blank.

DICKINSON: Baked beans - it had money in it.

PAPA: He opened a can of beans and found only one bean and an entire can of bean sauce.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: On Thursday...

DICKINSON: (Laughter) That is - oh, my God.

PAPA: On Thursday, Tyson Foods announced they would soon be selling plant-based blank.

DICKINSON: Chicken.

PAPA: Shrimp. On Tuesday, Michigan became the first state to ban flavored blanks.

DICKINSON: Vapes, vape pods?

PAPA: Yes, e-cigs, vapes. That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAPA: A man in North Carolina says...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

PAPA: ...He shouldn't have to pay for the adult content that was charged to his cable bill because blank.

DICKINSON: His toddler ordered it.

POUNDSTONE: Close.

PAPA: Close.

DICKINSON: His dog.

POUNDSTONE: Yes.

PAPA: Yes, because his dog is the one who ordered it.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

DICKINSON: His dog.

PAPA: The man insists he was innocently watching TV in bed one night when his dog jumped on the remote control and accidentally subscribed to the Hustler channel.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: He's trying to avoid the $70 fee. And in the man's defense, the dog did order the movie 69 Dalmatians.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: Either that or he was just trying to - hoping to catch a video of that cat with the sexy face tattoo.

(LAUGHTER)

PAPA: Bill, did Amy do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Well, she got five right, 10 more points, total of 13, which Paula happens to have. It's a tie.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, boy.

(APPLAUSE)

POUNDSTONE: We're going to have to do all the ribbon-cuttings and all the....

DICKINSON: Together.

POUNDSTONE: ...Ceremonial events together this week.

DICKINSON: We got to do that, yup. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.