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Lightning Fill In The Blank

Aug 3, 2019
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PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can, each correct answer now worth two points.

Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Aida and Adam each have three, Paula has two.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Ugh.

SAGAL: OK.

POUNDSTONE: I'm going to need more than 60 seconds.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Well, Paula, you are in third place. You're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank.

POUNDSTONE: Yeah.

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Ben Carson defended President Trump's attacks on Representative Elijah Cummings and the city of blank.

POUNDSTONE: Baltimore.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, the White House claimed that blank was stalling a trade deal with the U.S. until after the 2020 election.

POUNDSTONE: China.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: For the first time in a decade, the Federal Reserve cut blanks.

POUNDSTONE: Borrowing rate.

SAGAL: Yeah, interest rate.

POUNDSTONE: Thank you.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, American officials confirmed that the son of al-Qaida leader blank had been killed.

POUNDSTONE: Osama bin Laden.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: An 84-year-old woman lost for four days in the Canadian wilderness demanded blank upon being rescued.

POUNDSTONE: Beef yogurt.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: A cold beer and a hot tub. This week, Disney World competitor blank announced they were opening a new theme park in Orlando.

POUNDSTONE: Universal Studios.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A homeowner in Florida declined to press charges...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...After the owner of a Tesla blanked.

POUNDSTONE: Owner of a Tesla drove into their living room.

SAGAL: No, an owner of the Tesla parked on his lawn, took out a charging cord and stole the guy's power for 12 hours.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The man said he had no idea how long the Tesla had been sitting on his lawn before he finally noticed it. But after calling the police to make sure the car wasn't stolen, he decided to just wait for the owners to return. When they did, they didn't apologize, though they did offer to make them in dinner to make up for the inconvenience and then went inside his house and cooked all the food in his fridge.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Paula do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Five right, 10 more points, total of 12...

SAGAL: All right.

KURTIS: ...For the lead.

SAGAL: We have flipped a coin. Adam has elected to go second. That means that, Aida, you're up next. Fill in the blank. On Thursday, the Senate passed a bipartisan blank deal, sending it to Trump to sign.

(LAUGHTER)

AIDA RODRIGUEZ: Budget.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

KURTIS: Yes.

SAGAL: On Wednesday, the Trump administration announced it would set up a system to allow Americans to legally import some drugs from blank.

RODRIGUEZ: Mexico.

SAGAL: No, Canada. For a second time in a week, blank reportedly launched two more short-range ballistic missiles.

RODRIGUEZ: North Korea.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After he was bitten by a shark, a surfer in Florida immediately got out of the water and went to blank.

RODRIGUEZ: The bathroom.

SAGAL: The bar. A new blood test for blank could show signs of the disease decades before the first symptoms arise.

RODRIGUEZ: Cancer.

SAGAL: No, Alzheimer's. Less than a month...

RODRIGUEZ: Oh, wow.

SAGAL: ...After winning her second consecutive World Cup, Jill Ellis, the coach of the U.S. women's blank team, announced she was stepping down.

RODRIGUEZ: Soccer.

SAGAL: Yes.

POUNDSTONE: There you go.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a truck driver in Colorado avoided getting a ticket...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...For a broken tail light by replacing it with blank.

RODRIGUEZ: I don't know. I don't know.

SAGAL: A Gatorade bottle - red Gatorade. The officer who pulled the truck over says he was impressed with the driver's temporary fix, which was just a red Gatorade bottle duct-taped over the broken tail light - basically, an electrolyte.

(LAUGHTER)

RODRIGUEZ: An electrolyte.

SAGAL: An electrolyte. The man was let off with a warning after agreeing to replace the tail light soon, while the marketing department and Gatorade were given a great idea for their new ad campaign, Gatorade - drink and drive.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Aida do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Three right, 6 more points, total of 9. You're in second place.

POUNDSTONE: There you go.

RODRIGUEZ: Adam has...

ADAM BURKE: Here.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: How many of them does Adam need to win?

KURTIS: Five to win - only 5 to win, Adam.

SAGAL: Here you go, Adam. You can do this. This is for the game. Fill in the blank. On Tuesday, the governor of California signed a law mandating that presidential candidates release their blanks before appearing in the primary ballot.

BURKE: Tax returns (laughter).

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

RODRIGUEZ: (Unintelligible) know all of these.

SAGAL: On Monday, the departing governor of blank selected his proposed successor.

BURKE: Puerto Rico.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A man in Florida arrested for driving under the influence told the arresting officers that he wasn't drinking while driving. He was blanking.

BURKE: Doing classic cocaine.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: He said he wasn't drinking while driving. He was only drinking at stop signs.

(LAUGHTER)

RODRIGUEZ: Florida.

SAGAL: On Monday, blank announced that over a hundred million customers had their data breached.

BURKE: Facebook.

SAGAL: No, Capital One. Oh, that's what's in your wallet.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, the organizers of the embattled 50th anniversary of the blank music festival announced it was canceled.

BURKE: Woodstock.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A South Carolina thief who stole a FedEx package off a woman's front porch...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Was probably surprised when they opened it and found blank.

BURKE: That - one of those weird fake babies.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Nine tarantulas.

(GROANING)

SAGAL: On Friday, the woman got a notification that her package containing nine tarantulas had arrived, but when she got home, the box was missing - yet another victim of the porch pirates who'd been stealing deliveries from houses throughout the neighborhood. She notified police, who say they're on the lookout for a suspect whose 5'9'', brown and desiccated and entombed in webs.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Adam do well enough to win?

KURTIS: We have a tie - Adam and Aida. That means Paula is the winner.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Congratulations, Paula. I'm surprised but happy.

(LAUGHTER)

POUNDSTONE: I'm shocked.

(LAUGHTER) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.